Sunday, August 19, 2012

Shawal of 2012


It has been a long while since i wrote, well with instagram and tweeter, seems blogs have lost their touch. Still for me the writing is something that soothe my soul and keeps the demons at bay.

Raya comes yet once again and for millions of muslims around the world, the joy of celebrating ramadan becomes a big occasion. No matter what creed or what happens, no one does not celebrate it. The most trying times are for those that have lost their love ones, for you can see the mosques is filled with people visiting the graves of the departed. How will it be 20 years from now? would they still be visiting? I worry about that, as more and more families become westernize, the need to visit graves have given way to looking good and going around visiting houses. So much so that some have even forgotten where the graves are and yet they forget that one day soon, they too will be resting in the graves and as such how would they feel when no one visits or takes care of them? i usually get a bit of emotional because as i am on borrowed time, it dawns on me always to value those that are still around.

For me, the joy of raya is with my kids and family, my mom and my step dad, for the 3rd year the kids are with me (Thanks Nissa) and without them i would think that this day would lose all of its value and charm. As a man of tradition and of adat, these are very important to me. This year after over 8 years, the routine of the Lost Boyz meeting up on raya eve was joined, the last time i was there was when arwah zaki was yet still alive and izzany as well. Catching up with the boys showed me how life has changed for all of us, many married and with kids (Apat...cepat la) and yet the bond and closeness is always there, anchored by the past of hardship and turmoil that we all had shared and endured together.

As yet, i am still single and raya preparations for me and kids are done by me and mom, will this ever change? i dont really know, with my heart closed and a feeling of coldness that decends on me, i doubt any woman would be able to penetrate it much more to steal it. Hope? well if God has a plan for me than i shall accept what ever that comes, for now the kids are my most important of all and such they are the ones that occupy my efforts. After all, when im dead and buried, it is them that i hope to come and visit me on raya day. Take care and selamat hari raya to all.
PEACE

The family...

This is the most memorable moment