Farewell Ramadan 14

Its about 1 am and im home. Just finished with the kids and preparing for bed. The truth is its hard to sleep, been having sleeping issues, well not all the time, just missing something that i need.

A whole month of June gone by and July is leaving us in a few days, we start the last 6 months of the year. Ramadan is also sadly leaving us with the dawn of Shawal coming. In my writing, i think that this would be my forth raya online, things change and yet they stay the same, My life  has evolved to changed, the kids are getting bigger and i do have someone to call my own, well its a start, well wishers and others. The world as it seems to be spinning to wildly on its axis.

The loss of MH370 still haunts the world and in the midst of all that, MH17 gets shot down over Russia. How ironic is that? As we stumble through the grief and sadness, we are shocked by the audacity of the Israeli government of attacking and killing in Gaza, Where are the powers of the world? USA would not blink twice if it was Iran or Iraq, within 24 hours they would be there but since its Israel then all they do is talk. Talk. Talk is cheap, everyone can talk. Take it from me that i have been through it many times, months of meeting people, I was amazed that someone would give up an easy life in the dark world and take a bold step to chase their dream, A dream that is surely filled with hardship but boldy the person faces it and i for one will stand by her side in all the turmoils.

The world needs love, we as humans of the world, We merely sit and sigh and whine, we ask people to join our prayers and yet we do not do anything at all, Someone told me, instead of making police reports, social media blizzard, why don't we all write a petition and send it to world leaders and put that on facebook, that is doing something. LOVE, that is what we need, love sets us free and love makes us bold, strong and daring, Love of our country, Love of Family and Love of our spouse, that was why Afghanistan could not be defeted by Russia or USA, even with old rifles and not technology or even airplanes, They won the war.

As we all celebrate a whole of fasting, lets us not forget the lost of others, Mh370 and MH 17, to me the unknown fate of MH 370 is far sadder than MH 17 but a loss is still a loss, be thankful for your life, the things that is not lost and grateful for what we have, even if the days get dark and stormy, worry not, whine not but be grateful in the knowing fact that the sun will still shine come tomorrow.

Peace folks

Batteries Needed

**Delayed Posting-Ws meant for June**
Whoa..almost missed the June month, Well better late than never i always say. Dont be surprised that this is done at 1250 noon and not the usual 3-6am...heck i havent slept at all... no no it wasnt the world cup football... it was more of a storm... anyhow.. here i am.

It almost 2 days till Zaki's birthday and i still wish he was here and there is not a day that goes by that i wish i had him or i was with him. This month has been a month of a roller coster ride, work wise there are many decesions that needs to be done and many things that i have to decide. As i said before this time around, i live my life for me and no one else. a turmoil of emotions and feelings. Yet thru the barricades, we push thru.

Love, such is the mystery of the word, a world of fantasy and magic, Why magic? magic because of what it can do, the magical things that would one would never think of, Flying thousands of miles to see a smile, to cook a special dish, to have a bed full of rose petals, to bring smile and laughter for these are magical moments, Fantasy because of the things you feel you can do and the intimate quiet night staring into each other eyes no need for food or anything . For most, love feeds them, it is the fuel for the soul, it makes us strong, daring and bold. We fight for love, we do things for love. To do deeds or to work hard to accomplish a goal for a loved one the things we do to keep love alive, silently changing ourselves so that we may be able to keep the love one with us. And so, millions of people search for love, millions would abuse it while millions more yearn for it. There are but a few that are scared of it, although they prayed for it and allowed love in their hearts, yet it scares them, unable to take the negative to positive, My dad use to say, you can take a horse to the water but you cant force it to drink. I have fought for what i want all my life, to find that someone that can calm my raging thoughts and shackle the demons within, they have been a few that crossed my path and yet i never expected to find it merely 5 months ago(almost 5) and it was never easy, i had resisted and tried to hold back, in the end i just let it flow and the things about me that would annoy others only made me more lovable to her and all the things about her that she thought would drive me away only made me even closer to her, Yet, it is never enough and sadly the reason was i guess my curse and that as always brought disaster.

How do you fight for someone that does not want to fight? being the fool that i am, i gave in my all and yet its like quick sand and slowly i am sinking. Holding on with all might, yet even the mighty fall and the words of " If you love something then let them go" comes to play. I always worry that she wont come back .

What is life all about? the million dollar question and one that no one have the answers, If it was never meant to be than why did it ever cross your path and no problems arise, except the one we create and make it up on our own.

As i sit here and my heart is bleeding badly, it is amazing how cold a person can be, all for no reason but in their own mind, Where this will lead? all i know i gave it my all and it just wasn't good enough. For those of you out there, be strong, have faith and never give up on love, it is the most magical serum for life. Live your life. Find you path.

Trip of an expectant kind

Trip of an expectant kind 

Along came and pick me up and then we went to get amy. From there we drove straight to danok and did the usual taxi arrangement.  The guy was an old friend son but still he wanted to jedi me with 360 for the 3 of us. Along couldn't go to hatyai as his parents was on the way in. I asked for a favor and asked him to adjust and he did. Now I haven't eaten anything from morning but needed to lock the flights so I had to head into hatyai first. Told the tummy to shut up and away we drove. The driver made a pit stop to put petrol and even sold petrol to some customers. .imagine that. We proudly told us that the petrol was from malaysia.. hahaha .. after this stop,we headed into hatyai as I had to change money. I remembered the last time  I went to Bangkok. The rates inhatyai was better than there. So back to the familiar town..memories of years came flushing back..anyway got a rate for 9.80 (gonna go check later in bangkok) it was to the airport.  The driver friend kept calling me to ask where were he staying as he was trying to sell hotel rooms and girls I guess but im an old traveler in hatyai so I told him that I havent figured it out yet. 13 km to airport which is about 20mins with the car whizzing thru traffic,we made it.

Thai airport security was tight,even from before. They check everything prior to ur entrance into the airport. Even cars was checked twice. Once in the airport,I had to figure out the flight. There are two airports in bangkok and I had to go to the right one. From nok air to air asia,I finally choose thai airways (always wanted to fly thai) and bought the tix to and fro which xame to rm450. I was there atv1245 and the next flight easier was at 335pm. Jezzzz... so as along and amy left,decided to call her and get some food. So I called her..we chatted a bit and laugh a whole lot more..the signes of missing each other and the anticipation of seeing each other hidden within words and sentences.

Lining up for f;ight

Sat down for chicken rice. .didn't even taste it..its like im on auto pilot. All the while a sinking feeling in my gut.. worried..in fact I have never left on a solo trip. After losing zaki and izzany,im always on guard for the next tragedy. Scared I wont be back in time... but i kinda heard my dad whispering that there are times that we must have peace and solitude.  She brings me peace and intrigue me so,this big sacrifice that im putting up is for her so that I could earn place within her life. Oh ..anyway..

After chicken rice was done, I looked for a smoking area..oh my god its so hard to find but found one in the top restaurant.  Had cha yen (thai for iced tea hahahaha) and smoked up..knowing the next one be far off. As i got up to go to the departure hall, I make a silent prayer to al mighty to watch over my kids and family,my company . my team and my work as I am away.

Getting into the departure area proved another intense checking...mh370 whiplash maybe.. then its 3pm now and im sitting here waiting to board. One thing I can say..the chairs are really comfortable.

Sooooo what did I get her? It was tough call.. yes the romantic soul is awaken but I wanted to do something different,something I never did for anyone in 44 years, I decided to combine and make it a package. I just hope I dont overdue it..which I have a tendency of doing...

Warmth- in everything we need warmth. In relationship,warmth is measured in actions,words and deeds. This was the first gift. Warmth (Dont get wrong idea..dirty minded)

Time- what is the point if we cant make time?  I have lost due to insufficient time and yes my time is prioritised to my kids and family but its right to expand it a bit and include her on the list. So that was the second gift. Time.

Memories- memories are the only treasure that last with us. Other things will be lost for memories stay within us,good or bad it is was shapes our actions and are our lessons. The third gift I gave her was memories,although its only been over 60 days but there a million moments we shared.. that was my third gift. Memories.

Trust- this is the essence of life,for without it then nothing will be worth it. It is harder to do than said. Demons. .old bad memories usually get the better of us and causes us to suspect and assume and this leads to an all out war. So as proof of trust. That was the forth gift, Trust.

Sugar-To encompass all this gifts, I gave the final gift of sugar. This is so that pur journey will always be sweet,even thru dark and stormy times. Sugar. (Deym thing melted in the bag)

Ok gonna get back reading my book. Will update later.

Update 6pm thai. Just landed. Damn plane was delayed. ..sigh.. ok waiting for bag..why am I nervous? I have face em all and im nervous???

Update 930pm thai.. met with her...oh how much have I missed that smile... got back to her house..really nice house..met up with the family. (Deym chocs melted in the bag..now how am I gonna do this)
Mum: very nice.thai culture and she is so cool,. Cooked for me and all. Tried chatting but language barrier... Ok here is the breakdown:

Toi: man of the house. Nice guy, funny, Decent. .and accommodating.

Pon and pen: niece and nephew.  Kids will be kids.  They were a tad shocked when i ate with my hands. Should have bought chocs or something. This language barrier is hard..gonna resolve it for my next trip.

Chien- brother. Looks a lot like her, spoke in english to him so the barrier wasn't bad.

Mickey: growls a lot but a kitten a heart.  Very adorable. 

Kitty: wiser than mickey but also cuddly and ended up kissing me all over.

The house is nice and petit.  Comfy and roomy.  Semi detached housing estate, pretty posh area as well.

Bangsen Beach

Ok heading out to the beach..We went to Bangsen Beach..
Which reminds me of penang.. penang of old.. it was filled with students as the uni was very near by.  Had a few pool games. we chatted.  Hard for people to believe but that is an ideal outing for me. Came home happy and far more happier than before all the stress seems to melt aways..all fits so perfectly.

4/05/14  

Woke up after a good sleep,..wow thats rare..usually in a new place,my senses r always alert but so relaxed here. A quick shower as there was a sweet enticing smell from the kitchen.  She was cooking..her mom made a thai sup and it was a delicious lunch..with her brother and sister in law (well he didnt eat,said diet and made me shy with my tummy hahahah) It kind makes me wonder,what do they think of me being there.  A muslim divorced dude in their home but they made me feel so welcome that I dont have the slightest fear or discomfort.  Another sign perhaps?
Then after lunch as usual,work calls. Spoke to the team and tony. Arranged a few stuff and troubleshooting. I really want her to come to lgk for muay thai on the 8th but worried about her return back..she might be too tired and alone.

Today was more to shopping.  With some issues of work back home, had to balance. But she,her mom and me went to the near mall and shopped..had star bucks. Managed to get most of everything for everyone. 

Great Company with a good view

As we finished, we went home to get the rest of the family for dinner. She took me to the family favourite local dinning spot. Mouy aroi, beach front seafood place. It was wonderful.  We had so many dishes and the taste was good. It was very clean and borders on the beach.  It had a 3 layer sitting place and only 2 smoking zone. Serivce was alright and we had a great time. Surely a place to bring my family up.we ended thr night with a chill session at home and prepared for tmr. Why am I leaving so soon..sigh.

05/05/14

My two models hehehe

nam tok waterfall.

Woke at 7am.. everyone was up to go waterfall. The kids and some of her mom friends.. after a quick shower,went to the living room and was shocked to find all the food everyone was preparing. As we packed,she told me it was about 2 hours drive to it. And her mom borrowed a big pickup and she was driving but seeing it was a manual and like it was a bit hard so I volunteered to drive. Wooow hoo ! Driving in Thailand to a waterfall, the drive was cool,we stopped at her brothers place and pickup her mom friends.  After 2 hours and thru back roads which borders mymar, we arrived.
There was a tix price and all 8 of us costed rm35..not bad at all. Once inside,I can help but be amazed of how clean and organozed everything is. There were security people and dustbins everywhere.
We had brought kitty amd mickey although it was not allowed amd hence some ninja needed to be done. 

We first had massive picnic and ate the roasted chicken we bought by the road side.  After the meal we made our way up. Unlucky for us the guard saw and moved in to stop the us. So her mom was left behind to tend to mickey and kitty. We treked onwards. After a short walk we came to the first level. Inwas told there are 7 levels amd we had to hike up. Which we did. 

The hike was beautiful and I did not even see one cigarette butt which goes to show how clean the waterfall is. We hiked up the 3rd level and stopped to swim. It was great..water so clean and cold and even had carps in them. It is said that thos carps if eaten will cause intoxication. ..an alternative to whiskey perhaps hahahaha. And so we pushed on.

At the 4th level..the water was so clear and beautiful.  The air clean... I think telaga tujuh langkawi should be like this.

We drove home and I rode in the back pf the truck.  Its a fun ride back. When we go home, everyone showered and I had dinner on a local stall. Just chit chat and relaxed. Came back and quietly presented her birthday gifts, the smile and joy in her eyes is something i will cherish for all my life.. it made everything worthwhile. 

06/05/2014-  

7am. On the way to follow her and family to temple. I followed to a nearby temple and watch the praying ceremony. It was her birthday so it was a special prayer added in then I realized that theirs is almost the same with a surmon to the followers. Later we went seafood shopping.  I was surprised at the freshness of the fish and crabs..there many stalls lined up and most of the seafood were still alive. After that we headed to a local plant shop and bought some plants. In malay culture,at birth,wedding or a start of something new,plants are planted to be a source of good luck and as a sign of growth in the endeavor.  Our last stop was a durian stall and again I learned something new of how durian fruits are bought and sold.
Well after all this u can guess it was a massive lunch..hahaahah seafood galore and durian as desserts. .. we all took a short nap.

Beautiful and yeah the view was nice as well 

Later we headed to the pattaya,it wasn't far and once there we had dinner at this romantic place over looking the beach. It was built on a cliff and had tiers for diners. Cosy and romantic,it was an ideal place to celebrate her bday. We sat and chatted and talked and later drove to the famous walking bar where it was filled with people and activites. We picked a bar with a live band and shot some pool. It was great and later drove back.

The final day,I woke with sadness at leaving and yet excited to see my kids again.. weird being sad and excited at the same time.. we took a drive to pattaya floating market to get last minute gift for friends and family.  After that we took drive to the airport after lunch. The floating market was again clean and properly managed. It had many activites and was built with areas for tourist.prices were cheap and the seller friendly. 

In all the trip was not something that i had expected at all, many of course would imagine a birthday with a massive party and friends and sorts but i was taken back with the trip, it was so humble and homely and brought back the old of me, i planted trees, help around the house, drove everywhere and it was as if things are meant to be, now it is about balance and merge, for i too have family and everywhere i went and did, i kept thinking Oh Ya Kierra would love this, Adik would be happy running there and i do plan a next trip with the kids, go take em see the dolphine show. All in all, we must try, difreent culuture or religon does not it must end but rather it is a challenging but yet rewarding journey but we must be bold, be brave for every journey has mishaps and problems and do we stop and turn around (deym this song is actually playing now hahahah) and return to where came or do we be brave enough to repair the damage and continue the journey. As i return to Malaysia, i know that i have left a piece of me behind in Chun Buri and yet that it will grow and be a strong tree, strong enough to withstand the strongest winds and yet shady to block event the hottest of sun light. Well thats all folks, till next time. Keep your hopes up, Be brave and remember to include MH370 into your prayers and please do not forget them, keep them alight and burn within us. 

PEACE.

Welcome home committee 

Pattaya

Beef Noodle at Floating Market

My forever cheer up team

Must love dogs

Oh god did i missed April? Izzany birthday was on 24th while Nissa was 28th, so Happy Birthday wishes. Izzany, how i miss you brother.
damn... Well was busy with work and life but i thought i take this time to write a bit before i fly off.

Was at home and watched "Must Have Dogs" on Astro, an old love romantic movie but it was nice, i do take watching movies seriously, as times we learn some lessons in it. For me it was a sweet movie of how one recovers and bounce back to the relationship thing after being hurt or alone for a long time, the cliche of the movie was how the girl actually came back and swam for the man (you have to watch it to know it)
This i guess is the ethos of matters, How important is someone in our life? is it true that we under value those that is most valuable and chase those that are not? what about chasing dreams that aren't real while letting go the miracle that is in front of us? I don't have the answers for all that, for me i take my cue from God and Fate. Being slapped by a girl kinda work me.. go figure. Well times i wish life are movies, )have my red cape and underwear on standby*superman*) I wish it would be easier if we could just tell people what it is that is in our mind, assure them to rest their fears and that we are scared too, to heal and give another chance, for it would be so nice to be valued, to know that you are important in the grand scheme of things and not merely an object of money, work or ideas, being a leader is a lonely place. Talking about that, there was another movie called "For Love or Money"(although i did write about it once) this guy gave up his dream investor to be with the girl as the girl was going away, what would it take for us to realize the value of others? to take the next step in a growing relationship and making the jump. Being at my age (28 always hahaha) gives me the glimpse and worry that others don't see, the skill to look forward and avoid potholes (still hitting them) is hard to acquire. I guess life is just like that. Since 2009, i have never taken a proper time off, only recently with trips to Lgk as a tourist, genting and bukit tinggi, non family, just me and her. Its not that i could have not done it before but was never motivated to do it. And tomorrow, i take a step by taking a first personal vacation in over 8 years. Scared? you betcha but you never know until you try and even if its not mutual but i feel in my gut that its worth taking the step.

For in relationship, i guess it is always in stages, in a world of freedom and liberal, the first night is the hardest and surviving it is like the first step. Then comes the adjustment period where you try hide your shortcomings and highlight your good ones and then comes the natural stage, where you explore and learn more. I had given up long time ago, with girls now days on a money and status stage, so on this journey, i just let it happen, no planning no expectations and surprisingly everything clicks into place, a tad fast but 60 days flies by so fast, Why must be scared of the future? For future is what we shape it to be. Sacrifices and effort become easy if we do it from the heart and now with bad intentions. I trust in God and his will is my path, for everything happens for a reason and it is up to us to make full of the chances and blessing that He has given us.

As time draws on us, we must always value for what we have and treasure it, like a plant, furnish it with water (love), build a strong foundation(trust) and give it sunlight to grow (responsibility) for if not it will stray or worse die. Many times i had wished those in the past would have seen this, maybe i didnt try hard enough but for this time, i am going the extra mile to see if what i feel is real or merely a mirage. Pray for me.

On that note, Please don't stop praying for MH370, do not forget them, pray for them in our daily prayers. For collectively we are far stronger than being alone.

Peace.

Keep praying please

My reasons

A journey

Water day

Failed camera man

Unsung Heroes

Oh god its 6am again.. and here i am writing nonense yet again but some words just cannot be kept in...

Against the better part of judgement, i was drawn into the conficlt of an ongoing thing, Something that i would not walk into but circumstances do change..

I run AKR and now side by side with another company, in 2008, i had this dream to bring paintball to the north, and i had no idea what it meant to be an organizer apart what i had learned from the master Abg Lan of isi rimba. SO i gave a call to the big taiko of paintball, both got into voice message, and after 12 hours once call came in while the other never came till today. It was this guy i met, Gung Ho and Ping Pong and together we tried to do the immpossible, bringing teams to fight for Sultan's Cup. In sugai Petani where no paintball field was there, PALS build the field on soggy ground that i personally put in my blood and tears to do. at 7pm a day prior to the opening match (mine was a small event that could be done in one day) teams came from outside of kedah and waiting on the field status, it was 7pm and i spoke to head marshall and as much as i tried, i could not get hime to budge on the saftey of the field, therefore till 6am we worked through out the night to put together the field, and finally after being satisfied of the condition of the field, the guy approved it and The fight for Sultan's Cup was on. Jun until today remains the stauch and loyal to the game of paintball till today...

In 2010, Me and my brother wanted to do Sultan;s cup again and Paul pulled in his part and made it happen, this time in the grand stadium darulaman, it was great,HM came again and rotted for the state team, it was a hard event, we were not prepared for many things, operations, funding and what not but against it all, we did to execute the event and all was good. Although paintball was banned from the stadium and we were fined pretty bad espicially after the field was on RTM for the live soccer match merely 4 days after Sultan; Cup did not help but ratherwe strived and pushed on, later the year Her Royal Highness agreed to patron World Cup Asia Langkawi and the uphill task began. Aside from upstarts event such as the asia bali cup trying to de rail us and Pro Master Pahang that managed to steal a few of our sponsors, IT was with the patron that we meet Dato Shaberry Chick and obtain acknoldegment of paintball, it was at that time that we sat stumped on how to set up 4 fields in Mahsuri hall without damaging it, Well, Nick solved it and the first of three WCA happen.

Come the second year, we had listend to the comments of the PB, toilets, field lights and all the shortcoming of the event and we strived to improve, and all in all, we staged with by breaking the Malaysia Awards of which we hold till today.

By the third year, we tried our best to improve, alas the hal had electrical problems that reduced the effectivness and Tun was hospitalized in IJN on the closing dinner.

Why did we do it? we never made money on a RM3 M cost setup but we did it and we have been trying to improve ever since, Success is never as good til you hit perfection and yet we reached out to many and worked together on media and recongnition for the sport, there were no more wars, with WCA as a platform, things start to simmer down

But things changed as WCA 2013 loomed in the picture, people tried to dissuade us from PALS and though their shop was caught in a fire, i just wonder why the support never came.

Times we tried the more people say and talk about, going personal as racist and hinting of lies of RM10k that they never did aim for and yet was given never crossed the issue, the fact that we hold the event as beneficial to the teams was never mentioned, playing against Ironmen was something rarely seen, do people remember the unsng heros?
*That part was written earlier* This part is dated 25/03/2014

The MPF elections are done and i hope the newly elected will provide the fill of the missing gap in the industry, let us not turn into a warring faction but rather work as one, first to handle the marker issue then later on a program that would reward and bring about a new change and new teams for paintball. As we strive to bring in the world series to Malaysia and do a massive WCA 2014 (in conjunction with VMY 2014) i asked for support and hope that all the efforts to make and stage this world class paintball championship is enjoyed by not only in the sport but the many spectators and new converter fans.

One a sad note, The fate of MH370 was announced yesterday by PM DSN, it is a sad day for Malaysia, Truly sad, the fact that it took us 14 days to know where the aircraft was and how we are so reliant on other countries is a sad fact, We must now do closure and work even harder to build international ties and promote our country for Tourism is a major earner, They have gone to a better place by God and its now up to us to learn from this tragedy, NEVER TAKE ANYTHING FOR GRANTED. A goodbye today maybe the last goodbye and so never end a day with anger or animosity as you might never know what tomorrow brings, For the passagers and crew of MH370, you shall be included in my daily prayers and for the families and friends, be strong and pray. For all of us, lets us not forget of the unsung hero in the saga, from the ground staff to those that have been searching for days with no sleep and rest, to those that was covering the tragedy and all the was involved directly and in directly, remember mh370 dont let it merely be a statistic.
Peace
*No pics to share this post*

Prayers

Its again 6am ...

The Nation is in mourning, we are sadden of the loss of MH370, A thousand theroy and a million opinions and yet we are not even closer to the truth of it. Three of the crew members are firends of mine, we had served togther back in the days when i was a flight steward, i cant imagine what the family is going through and i pary for the safe news of MH370 with not only Malaysia but the whole world.

Rather than spew my theory and opinions like the other thousand experts out there, let me take a stab and write about MH370.

If anything taht regrads to the flight of MH370, the one thing that we can learn is the lessons from it. LIFE IS SHORT AND UNPREDICTABLE. I now fly every week and recently i fly my son in for his classes, what would happen if it was his flight? How do you react, we humans have gone soft, gone lazy, we take things for granted, we forget of the Al-Mighty, We forget of our purpose. Before MH370 we never did take people flying seriously, family members that travel overseas, loved one going to study, parents going for Umrah or children going to study, how many of us actually gave a thought about it? Flying is now normal and like everyday thing, Everybody can fly (sorry Tony and Air Asia) but as we get more advance we start to lose focus on the important things, a father flying to Beijing for work in order to make his famliy life better thus sacrifice the time with family and going to work, thinking that the next time we see them we can tell them. We forget, We lose focus. If anything that we can learn from this tragedy is that we must take life seriously, the ones we love, would it be great if we knew but we dont. So why do we still have ego and a misgudided sense of importance? i wake every day now with heavy heart, saddness of those that lost their loved ones on MH370, i worry and i am scared, what happend if God took me, have i done the best i could, Did i make sure my loved one KNOW that i loved them? i am scared

Love is great thing says a singer (cannot remember) but for me, its love of the heart, beyond money, beyond looks. IF having a BF revolves to the fact that he has an auto export car business and that personally he has a ferrari, pandemera and etc, Does that mean going public to spike of his wife and generating pubikcity, Would she still do what ever she did if he was merely a burger stall operator? or would he give her the time of day, if she worked in Watson? Nah, wont happen, our world is goverend of money. As i was having late dinner and dicussing this very fact, I know of financial stability but yet there is a merit and limit on it, And of coveting other people money ? so many examples, where would Hang Tuah be? Gandhi? We are a poor excuse at times, So folks, lessons of the day is that after you read this, please make so efforts to chase the love lost and rebuild a bridge over stilled waters, Do it now.. for tomorrow may be to late. Anyhow, here is movie reviews of this week (300 rise is not even worth it unless its a really quiet day)

About Time
                  What would you do if at the age of 21, you discover that you can go back into time? What would you do?

The story revels it a most natrual way, making you be a part of Tim, comparing our low times in our life to the movie, The lesson is finally shown in his father teaching and the final lesson in the end

12 Years a slave

                  Truly a great movie, maybe a lot of movies have been about slave but this is so refreshing that we value the simplest liberties that we have. Watch it please

On that note, nite folks and please th goverment of Malaysia, now is not the time to worry about an oppisation leader screwing someone arse(literally) it is not the time to worry about elecations or sports but about the more important of running a country.

Peace

Of those things

Its almost 6 am in the morning and i just got home. Where was i? out with some brothers ... anyway..just wanted to write..dont like it then log off ya..

Listening to Streets of Fire..One of my all time favorite... well it was hell of a week, work and work..till i cannot think and over board.. so ..pen a few..

To the one that feels i owe you and that im your my servant while your the master...

The world is round and till you are all alone then do not talk about lost or sacrifice, As you whine about how things are looking bad, have you yet forgotten how was it that we got here? how we had to rent a car and convince the powers that be to let us have the event. The event that not only changed our lives but the whole scene of the sport, Still after 4 years, you are never grateful that we are not merely running a cyber cafe nor your stuck in a lwa office that is slowing sinking, in spite of all the losses and all the pain, we have walked to the PM office, ministers office, Been in the inner circle of a former prime minister, who is now a mentor, Close and tight with a chief minister,in spite of all the cheating and betrayal of the people around us but yet we survive, we may not exploit it as others, we go with our hearts and hopes and hard work, till now we have partners across the country and within, people who trust our judgment and vision. Where does it come from? did it come from you? are you now putting and making the sacrifices needed to make it work or are you merely making noise from a safe spot and waiting to jump on the bandwagon. YES, before you gave the it breath but that was before, who pushed it thru, who holded your hand in dark times? Who has gained in the past two years? and who will this next few years, am i yet still have to give everything up? handle as minute as your bookings? why dont i just step up and move on my own, i mean i said three years and three years its up, if we cannot accept what must be done then i would be damn to be only bread winner the only one figuring things out, if anyone wants to be the boss of me then behave and take on the hat, if merely whining, my daughter also can. I want us to excel.. i want us to be all that we can be.. WE not YOU or I.. WE.

To the one that i still yet keep my hopes up.

Over and over i get hurt .over and over i feel used and abused but yet still after all this time, i guess its time to walk away and accept the fact that it is not working. If you cannot see it then i cant help you.If you think i am merely a person to call on when you need my help but not ever thinking of my needs and want, or how i am doing, thus what is the point of whining of love or poems of a life of eqtiqque when you cant even practice what you preach. The ball is in your court.

To those that think i am cold and heartless.

Yes i am, i do not have the heart . it is a must to be the leader of this world but yet i have never cheated anyone, never said NO to request of help if i am able to . THINK.

To those that think i owe you

Yes i do but i can only do so much, if you cant complete and take of the chances, i will not sacrifice my kids just merely to save you.

To the one that gave me the two jewels in my life

I now know why, kierra and Iddraqi are the reasons that i am still here fighting, after all the crap that you have been thru, i am happy that you have found happiness, glad even though i feel i may never find the happiness of being loved and cherish while being challenged i am glad one of us made it, for me, my journey is tied to the kids and it is to them that i dedicate my life to, that is why people or potential partners feel i am cold or abusive it because my priority is the kids.

To the one who gave me the chance

Yes i may owe but who doesn't, we fight and we do what we can.  The journey is not over yet.. it is merely starting

To the rest of you

Find your place in this world, if you cannot find it then create one for it is our role in the scheme of things that define who we are and that is what we will be remembered for. Find love and keep it close.

Peace

Asyik a new path aje

Jeng Jeng Jeng, i am back ..hahahhaah been staring at the PC for the past 5 days, crcking this damn google app thing, pushing for a better 2014. It is time for growth, time for my son and daughter, in building this new cmpany in a new age, it is the old values that has served me well. Honesty, Loyalty and Humility. For we are only human and the roots that we have are enforced with the efforts that we do and the deeds we do.

Yah, 8 out of 10 people will disappoint us, will forget of us, will hurt us BUT 9 out of 10, given a chance, they will come back to value us, to finally realize how much better it was when we were in their life. In the end it those that are with us thru the hard times that we neglect most and yet they never leave us, its is does that is envious of our success, secretly cavorting us that we should be aware of. In the new world and age, where technology is the king and information is merely but a touch away, it is hard to imagine a world without news or update (REFRESH REFRESH) in an age of instagram and FB, we are all connected and it is far easier to hurt people when we dont even know it. My kids have FB and my daughter regularly update her status..she is 8 years old!! when i was 8 years old, i was still excited over watching TV3.. hahahahah

Anyhow, i guess it is the heart of a person that matters, i am truly blessed to have known, to learn and to be loved by those with a true heart and i try to keep myself to this ideals, there are times that i get side tracked but those close to me, dearest to me, will pull me back on track and for that i am thankful to them and to GOD for bringing them to my circle and ensuring that we are all connected, after all what is life with out circles.

Peace

A change in 2014.
I am now doing my own two sents review of movies.... go figure lah..

English
The Wolf of Wall Street

A much acclaimed picture, especially when it is linked to PM Najib son,(Seriously guys, if he wants to do movies or what ever, just because they are someone VVIP son does not make them ignorant lazy and proud, that is reserved for royalty )

Leonardo truly deserves an oscar for his performance here, the movie revolves around stock brokering,(if you want to know the plot then go and watch the movie la) The movie shows how a man can go up, lose his way and fall flat on his face but yet in true it all, he learns and truly changes himself to make not only his life better but to use the god given skills to turn other peoples life better.
Epic movie must see.

Ok thats all for now... as usual some pics and movie posters.. more reviews to come soon.

Peace

Scary Breakfast with my Mentor

She grows too fast

The playpen for the ferrets

See how they grow

A Wolf among sheep..sigh..apai apai

TV time during NWCAP 13

Lepaking in KL

Adik was so fascinated with the parrot

Long overdue

Ahhhhh its 2014, Man..i turn 44 this year..how time flies.. how about all of you? how are you faring in this new world... As much things change and yet they stay the same, many have told me that and now finally i see what they mean.

A new year means a new slate, A new battle and a new year. After 2013, We thought we had it all covered, a big title corporate sponsor and yet it all dwindle down, again i am back paddling. Though all in all 2013 was kind and harsh, with lessons at every corner, betrayal ..one after another.

It started with work but of course, as we were comping with 2012, we had to back peddle for funds and events, expanding the company into KL, with a strong workforce but mid year it all failed. Jealousy and envy reign within the office halls and those who claim to be close and caring, left..not only left but tried to sabotage and ensure the failure of the journey but god is great and in the end, we ended up with a stronger team and delivered one of the most memorable WCA ever. Still the year ended with more betrayals,

• Brothers of arms, at one time always helped each other and even had his account covered, came with a magical idea, conceptualized it, pitched it and in the end he just left us hanging.
• Brother of arms as well, worked and delivered many projects with him but being blinded with greed, used us and left us again
• Saying that "i wish you find happiness" and yet finding ways to injure and sabotage it is a betrayle of a painful nature. Still i endure and smile, wondering if they would ever understand what they did or how fake their words sound to me. Now i guess lets see if the value of them outweights the pain they had caused me. I mean, they know how much the person means and how hard is it for me to commit and when i take the step, far from being supportive, they just be cruel. truly.. weird. If there are flaws, then work and train it out, it was not that i have never done the same for them, they partners are not excalty kosher but far from listening to others or being a snob, i gave the person a chance and genulely accepted but when it came to my turn, Heck, always finding faults and being in my postion, cant even defend the person, they know what they did and i hope they realize that hurting something i love and care about brings a sour taste in my mouth and there is a price to pay for it, it is always a dish best served cold. Just pray no hiccups before i sink my fist in. Oh well, i leave it to God.

And yet,

• The dawn of 2014 brings a sense of calmness in me, as i dedicate my time for my son, yes he is going for speech therapy and starting to show signs of improvements.
• 2014 brings together a strong team from the 2013 WCA, dedicated and able to fight battles and we take on the world with gusto and spirit. 
• 2014 brings new brothers that focuses on advancement and success. 
• A year that bore a winning upcoming political canidate. It is now up to us to pave the road.

Kakak and Adik

All in all, it is a trying new year, as i swear to let it all go and focus on a new path, those who are strong and true, i pray will stay on with me, by my side and together we fight for a better tomorrow, no drama, improving our weakness and enhancing our strgenth. It will not be a smooth road and many decesions will effect many people and will hurt more people but choices have to be made, roads must be decided and together, lets hope that come 2015, january, i am able to write the success of it all.
Happy New Year Folks

My princess

Peace.

Pyro Beat KL With Ezzany

Bukit Merah Resort

Lost but saved by Nissa

With my mentor at mountain bike challenge 2013

Jamming with DJ Hana K

The reasons of my being

Memories...

Adik turns 6

Smiling and active

NWCAP

Care Speech boss