Being the first born in my family and the eldest grandson, in my mind, the love of the mother is in bringing up the child, it is the mothers love that comforts the child, taking them for their bath, ensuring that they eat the right meal, sleep at the right time and other stuff. In my childhood, it was my mom that did it for my brothers, when evening came , it was her that made all of us bath (heck..even I also kena) she made sure we ate the right food and did our duties and slept at the same time.
Dominantly, the father is the provider of the family, it is to him that they run to ensure their safety, A father provides the roof, food and all the must of life. There is an old saying, if the child is rude and dirty than blame the mother and if the child poorly dress or has not enough to eat than blame it on the father. To us, the brothers, our father had to work outstation most of the time and such we saw him around once or twice in a fortnight BUT we know that in times of trouble, it was him that would come back and save us. There were times that I had trouble with the law (ya ya..i started early) and once I had a bad accident and 2 of my friends died in it, it was my father who appeared magically and made the trouble go away, the sight of him made me feel invincible and I knew that I was safe.
In these modern times, many parents let the maid to raise their children, to them, providing occasional toys and petty hugs and kisses are enough. Fathers role do not change much as they still work day in and day out while providing for the family but in these new times, the mothers has passed their traditional duties to the maid. It is because they are working or socializing. We read in the newspaper everyday of the morale decay within our youth, the bohsia and rempit sickness that has plagued the land and even those in the university is not immune, we had thought they are safe in higher institution but later we find their videos of making out or full sexual escapades on youtube.
These are trying to be avoided and when it happens then parents are the one to blame but the damage was done so long ago, the child can see their mother not at home due to work or social parties and is left to the maid. How would a maid be able to displin the child?it is not her child afterall and usually when emergency happens, it’s the maid that know the intimate details of the child NOT the mother. What is going on now? Are children merely tokens now? As long we spend 1-2 hours with them a day and buy them some presents then they will grow up fine? I don’t really agree, I have 2 kids of my own and I do and try as much as I can to be with them, I want them to know that nothing in this world is more important than them. (heck, imagine seeing me running around in a mini kids park..) it is sad how money and the world changes our values, our family or more importantly our children that we work so hard for to provide a better future for them, ends up as porn stars on youttube or even worse leaves you at the slightest chance or becomes a rempit or bohsia.
Many parents face this problem in the later life, children running away with strangers while they trying to figure out what happen, not only the aspect of this but of safety and health is also a paramount reason. Children being left with the maid are not properly fed, they don’t have a fixed schedule in terms of sleep and eating (which usually is a start of a serious dieses) then mothers scream about mothers right or what happen? A mothers place is at home, with the children, that is why there is a saying that a mother love know no bounds, when I was ill my mom took extra care and neglected the world to ensure I recovered. When my brother had cancer, she gave up her life and stayed with him till the end. This is a mothers love, not sending the maid to ensure my brother took his medicine or his food, this is what is wrong with the world today. It seems many are not sure of their roles, many parents would rather be the rich style of raising kids, leave it all the maid (or sometimes maids)
With mothers day around the corner, I feel xtra love for my mom, for her sacrifices that she has made, not only for me but for my brothers and how even at a late age, she sacrificed to ensure I had a comfortable platform to build a foundation to raise my kids. I love her for the guiadance and support she gave me and it is my hope that my children will grow up knowing the love and support of parents as I had been privileged to. I also dedicate this article to my bro, Syed Joe who just had his 1st born son. Grats my brother, welcome to parenthood.
Peace